I used to work in Chicago
An old department store
I used to work in Chicago
I dont work there no more

A woman came in for a handle
A Handle from the store
Handle she wanted
Knob she got
I dont work there no more
Aaaagh!

I used to...

sailors/semen
ewe/rammed
paxo/stuffing
hat/helmet
kitkat/4 fingers
width/length
ruler/12 inches
herbert/rodgerd
richard/dick
hen/cock
finish/end
exit/entered
terra ingonita/explored
spoonbill/stalked
northern trunk road/A69
translation and interpreting/cunnilingus
batholith/intrusion
Battle of Hastings/invaded
Dentist/Filling
Eggs/Laid
Nitrates/Fertilsed
Pin/Prick
Voyager2/probe
Ding/dong
Book keeping/double entry
Beef joint/spit roast
Bacon/porking
TVP/meat
Margarine/spread
I can belive its nor butter/delight
Cocaine/ecstasy
boom/banged
drift mine/shafting
nail/screwed
hammer/nailed
honk/bonked
Starling/Thrush
Dialing code/STD
emu/rod
czech/pole
stampcollection/lickin'
cormorant/shag
tiptop/cream
blue whale/sperm
lard/man fat
applause/the clap
debenture/member
branch/root
William/willy
pass/tackle
MOT/serviced
gear/equipment
spoon/forked
velvet/felt
Aplha Course/intercourse
half a foot/6 inches
Cap'n Birdseye/Fishy Fingers
axe/chopper
William/willy
Traffic Calming Measure/humping
BigMac/Whopper
Donkey/Dobbin
hacksaw/tool
fork/prong
nikwax/impregnated

silver bath/golden shower*
Back door/rear entry **
Diamond earrings/pearl necklace **
single explosion/gang bang **

* from Rob ** from HD